Matthew 6:24

The question to ask myself is " is what I'm devoting my time and resources to something that can in return give me life?"

For me the answer is no. I've spent so much time attempting to set up this false sense of security that everything is ok because we have "fill in the blank" and most of the time I fill the blank with money. Im so obsessed with having a certain amount of money and stuff because in some twisted way I believe that when I reach a certain amount then we're secure from tragedy or disaster. I've grown up not trusting the fact that God would provide for my family because my view of provision was so distorted. I have for so long held the belief that if I had financial hardships then God wasn't providing for me. When if I took a bigger picture look at it, he's been keeping us floating for so long even though I haven't been faithful to him with the things he has entrusted me to be a good steward of. The message I've been getting from God very clearly is humility. I need to be more humble, because there isn't anything that I have, He hasn't given to me above and far beyond what I deserve, because the truth is based on my faithfulness to him, I deserve nothing, and I've been given so much. Sure I've worked hard to accomplish things, but without God I wouldn't have the ability to do any of those things. I have an amazing life, and it's about time I start realizing it and give thanks to the one who has given it to me. With the start of this Dave Ramsey study and Toby's new series 'Gravity' I'm in for a good bit of self examination, WHICH I HATE, because it usually means having to admit that I'm the problem and I can't blame it on anyone else. But, I can't change the past and I can't predict the future, so my goal is to live right now for Him and be obedient to the call He has put on my life. It won't be easy and I'll stumble before I get it right, but at least now I'm out there running towards the goal; literally and figuratively.